Reinforcing Positive Behaviors In Your Relationship

Part of being in a healthy relationship is navigating the waters of respect and loyalty and learning how to treat one another. Not only do you have to learn how to express how you want to be treated, you have to learn how to treat the person that you are committed to. This takes some time and a lot of effort, but when the behaviors are there you should be sure to reinforce what you do like in hopes that you will be lucky enough to be treated this way in the future.

The best thing you can do when you are treated in a way that feels good is to let your partner know that you appreciate their efforts. For instance, if you have a positive experience tell your spouse thank you or leave them a little note that said you were really excited by something that they did or that you appreciated their efforts.

If your spouse does something that they normally don't do around the house or to help out, make sure that you acknowledge their efforts. You can do this simply by saying thank you in a meaningful way. Saying thank you is a very powerful way to reinforce behavior. Many times when we do this our partners see just how easy it is to please us and if they know what pleases us they will do it again and again.

The best thing you can do to set a good precedent and let your mate know what you are looking for. When you are honest and straight forward about how you like to be treated you know that they know in no uncertain terms what you expect. Then, when your partner treats you in a way that is favorable or behaves in a way that you find particularly nice, you should say, "That is why I love you!" This lets them know that you appreciate their efforts without having to come across like a dictator of proper behavior.

Reinforcing positive behavior is really simple so long as you are straight forward about what you want and then if you take the effort to let someone know that they are doing right by you. This won't mean that there are never any issues between the two of you, but if you start out by communicating about what you want and then acknowledging the person when they do something the way you want you are going to be a lot happier in the long run.

Many people spend all of their lives trying to "train" someone how to behave or treat them when all you need to do is make it clear what you want and then set about reinforcing the behavior once it begins.

Rodrigo Rehn is a Relationships Expert, Linux Systems Administrator, Web Programmer, PHP Developer and CEO of FaceRomance online dating for singles.

Article Source: http://article-junction.com